Mj1: “Yo B! who this be B? Who this vodka drinkin’ bear wrestling 80’s Ivan Drago knockoff think he playin’? Glasnost? Nah B, this be some 80’s era, Soviet haterade! Yeah, yeah okay, his drinkin’ buddy Sokolov got in some good licks! But this guy thinkin’ he’s got my tombstone all carved and my plot marked! Cory! Yo, what you got to say to this B! Tell these people that this Bolshevic ain’t got the game to hang with this B!”
***Cory Carnes steps up to the camera smugly and adjusts his tie. He gives Mj1 a reassuring look and the shoots the camera an angry glare.***
CARNES: “Okay... okay. Now listen here you overrated sons of...”
***Carnes takes a step back and smooths his hair back. He takes a deep breath and collects himself. He clears his throat and addresses the camera once more, calmer.***
CARNES: “So... the illustrious Marty Dinkle has once again graced the airwaves with his honorable presence. What’s more, his trained monkey Yuri Kruchiev has seen fit to speak the king’s English and make bold claims about what he’s going to do to my client. That’s just fine... frankly, I was expecting this. In fact, I’ve been relishing the chance to thrust some verbal disco in D.I.E.’s direction. So let me begin by speaking first to the brains behind the brawn. Mr. Marty Dinkle. Listen here you pencil-mustached, 90lb human megaphone. You cheap suit wearing, hair-slicking, vaudeville reject. I know who you are and I know what you’re all about. I’ve been putting words in the mouths of blowhards like you for years. You’re all talk bluster and high handed proclamations as long as you have 600 pounds of dumb as bricks hired muscle standing between you and the consequences of your flapping gums. So if you think you can big-time a GRADE A, top-shelf once-in-a-lifetime CHAMPIONSHIP TALENT like Mj1 with your little song and dance act, you’re dreaming! And as for you Yuri Kruchiev... you mono-syllabic pair of mutton-chops attached to a shaved gorilla... you DARE to insult my client by falsely claiming he took a well-deserved beating from Vic Sokolov? You have the GALL to attack his warrior spirit and belittle his Herculean accomplishment?”
***Carnes slaps Mj1 on the chest and gestures magnanimously at his title belt.***
CARNES: “Let me tell you the TRUE story of what happened between Mj1 and The Siberian Psychopath. To tell that story we need to rewind the clock to five days earlier. You see... At at PWA Assault... my client had a highly anticipated championship title match against Pantaro. My client entered the ring a hungry challenger who wanted nothing more than to silence his doubters and prove to the world that he was the best damn sub-220lb grappler this sport has ever seen. For nearly 20 minutes, he took EVERYTHING that Pantaro had in him. He matched the LEGEND hold for hold. The crowd was going wild! It was a match for the ages. His KIDS were watching from the audience with tears in their eyes as their father... their hard working, humble father... fought for his life and his honor in front of a sold-out capacity crowd. Then, JUST when it looked as if he was going to put away his nearly unbeatable foe... the unthinkable happened. Akira Wyld interfered in his match. For reasons that are completely beyond me, Akira Wyld interrupted a sure fire glorious victory by entering the ring... and super kicking my client in the head. Exhausted... injured... insulted... Mj1 managed to pull strength from the depths of his soul. Fueled by the LOVE of his children, he crawled over and draped one arm over Pantaro, and the referee counted one, two, three. Because he is a WARRIOR. Because he is an iron-forged CHAMPION... my client managed to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. And in doing so... secured his name in the annals of history.”
***Behind him, Mj1 wipes a tear from his eye and nods.***
CARNES: “But did the world celebrate his hard earned triumph? No... immediately the PWA spin machine started and suddenly, Mj1 “stole” the championship from Pantaro. Suddenly Akira Wyld “handed” an undeserving cheater a belt he had no right to. I say BULLCRAP sir. Who got Akira-Kicked in the skull? Was it Pantaro? No!”
***Carnes shakes his head in disgust.***
CARNES: “But my client is not one to let insults like that stand. No, he knew what people were saying about him so he did the only thing he could. Against doctor’s orders, he demanded a match against the stiffest competitor he could think of. He wanted to put any rumors that he was a weak and undeserving champion to rest. Now... not only had he been the recipient of THREE Panther dives. Not only did he endure three rounds of bone jarring, high impact violence. But he received what was most likely a bell-ringing concussion from a heavyweight super kick to the skull. This man was in no condition to fight Victor Sokolov, and George Prescott knew it. But he fought anyway... and why? Because he is a MAN. He is a world class champion and that is what champions do. Yes... in his match with Sokolov he came up short. Who wouldn’t under those unbeatable circumstances. But for you to just dismiss that as a deserved inevitability... that is just wrong sir. That is ignorant, and insulting, and just... beyond the pale. So shame on you Yuri Kruchiev. Shame on you Marty Dinkle. Mj1 is a man among mice and you two barely qualify as rodent droppings next to him. So... as for your challenge. As for your insulting proclamation. WHEN my client finally meets you in the ring, you had better be ready for the fight of your life. Because Mj1 fears no man or beast. He is a wrestling GOD. And when you stand in his presence... you had better fall on your KNEES and pray to him for forgiveness.”
***A bead of sweat runs down Carnes’ forehead as he stares intensely at the camera. Mj1 glances over at him with a look of mild confusion.***
Mj1: “Damn B... uh, I mean. Yeah! Yeah what he said!”
***Mj1 throws up a pair of hand signs and sticks his tongue out at the camera as the screen fades to black.***Statistics: Posted by Quillz — Fri Apr 02, 2021 2:55 am
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